Domestic Taxi Service Provider, unpaid

Revised Taxi Drivers’ Code

Part II : Domestic Taxi Service Provider, unpaid

to be known as “The New Code”.

   

    Test assumes minivan is preferred transport. (Licenses to be Class A – Minivan-certified, and B – Other)

2.00.1      All domestic taxi driver applicants must undergo 9 months of training before the Domestic part of the test.

2.00.2      Approved manual labour or psychological conditioning may be substituted at the examiner’s discretion. (Certification of Idiocy or similar by a licensed professional is also an automatic qualify.)

2.00.3      Discharge of passengers at government facilities – Mandatory compliance. Test in all weather conditions, and sleep-deprived.

2.00.4      Closely inspect driver-trainee for performance in long queues of traffic awaiting discharge at one or more of the following:

Sports events; after-school activities; the close confines of unfamiliar non-public driveway configurations.

2.00.5      Test for road rage, with and without random quantities and mixes of:

Minor passengers from within and outside of the habitual family group; dogs; babies with plumbing “issues”.

2.00.6      The Speed test. Check for exit speed after the school bus has gone, without and then with backpack-loading.

2.10.0      During Phase II Driving Exam.

(Drivers must exhibit effects, including wear-and-tear, of at least 16 years of driving under previous conditions)

2.10.1      Test level of service and quality of language when driver is performing the 4am unexpected pick-up manoeuvre. This portion to be supervised by a senior examiner capable of administering caffeine (The hearing-impaired are encouraged to apply)  Place close attention to footwear for this portion of the test – fuzzy slippers are an automatic disqualify. Examiners should be aware that applicants may be looking for the automatic disqualification in Phase II.

NOTE: Administration of this test is for data-collection purposes only and passing does not imply fitness for anything.  And NO, we are not there yet!

More problems with the post!

I would suggest that, rather than keep increasing the cost of stamps, the Post Office might save on delivery costs by delivering everything to the first house on each road.Chat with government about this

The people in the first house could just take out their own items and send everyone else’s cards and letters next door. This would encourage neighbours to speak to each other and all the junk mail could go in a bin at the other end. House prices would have to be adjusted to make up for the added inconvenience of the things left at your location but everyone would know each other much better. :)

But… they have already started this apparently… and there are some flaws in the new plan.

I am happy to send mail delivered to me to the next house up – It is only fair as my other neighbour is bringing me all the mail of mine that he receives.

2 doors up they moved out months ago.  Delivering there is the weak link in the chain and immediately highlights why this new system is doomed…

We will just have to go back to delivering according to the super-duper, high-technology  sorted, postal code or zip code system that I thought they used anyway….Or, start training our own pigeons.